I'm actually quite interested in this.
My wife and I aren't getting any older and I think she's hoping to start a family in the next year.
It scares the crap out of me because I feel financially we can't afford it, won't be able to provide a good quality of life for it etc. However Everyone I talk to always say that you'll never feel like there's a right time etc.
Just curious how the new dads coped with those initial moments of new-dad-ness?
I am in Australia of course but most countries will help you out and cover a lot for the medical side of things. Here we only pay for the extra jabs needed and a lot of the initial doctor appointments and checkups were all free etc.
There is the big hit initially in getting stuff setup, and the top tip early on is not to buy many baby clothes yourself.. Family will give you more then you need in that regard as gifts and the Grandparents wont stop buying stuff.
Stuff comes as they get older. When you go on holiday you have to pay a fee for them and when they hit two it is like 75% of a full flight, so travel and things like that it starts adding up.
For us being a 1 bedroom rent, when this is up we need to move to a 2 bedroom so the cost there will go up as well.
So it will go up. In terms of the wife the way they used to work is over basically no matter how they look at it or spin it.
- They will go on leave for a long time, their work will need to fill the role.
- Even with them legally have to hold the role for pregnant women in most countries that is really hard for a company so even if they do come back to work it may not be the same role
- Day care is EXPENSIVE, especially here in Australia so it may not even be viable if your wife earns x amount and day care on that day is y and nullifies them bothering to go to work.
Then it is just all the life adjustments, being used to less sleep and shifting how you do your days around. Your holidays wont be the same and things like that and it is just adapting to the different way of life.
People kept saying to me do not let the kids make your life revolve around them, you just need to adjust and adapt to it and try to keep to the things you love.
- I can not play video games as much
- I go gym in the week a lot later
- I am a bit late Mondays and Thursdays dropping my son off to day care...
It is just change.