An woman was having a shower and
slipped over on the bathroom floor. Instead of slipping
over forwards or backwards, she
slipped over, did the splits and suctioned
herself to the floor. She yelled out for her husband john.

"John! John!" she yelled.

Jjohn came running in.
"John, Ive bloody suctioned myself to the floor" she said.

"Bloody hell!" John said and tried to pull her up.

"Youre just too heavy darling. Ill go across the road and get
a neighbour".

They came back and they both tried to pull her up.
"No way. We cant do it" the neighbour said. "Lets try Plan C"

"Plan C?" exclaimed John. "Whats that"?

"Ill go home and get my hammer and chisel and
well break the tiles under her"

"Great" John said. "While your doing that,
Ill stay here and play with her tits"

"Play with her tits"? the neighbour said, "Why
the hell would you want to do that"?

John replied "Well, I reckon if I can get her wet enough,
we can slide her into the kitchen where the tiles arent so expensive"

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAaaaaaaaaaGgggggggghurrgghhhhslurp.

rofl

Why cant they just lever her off with a crow bar like everyone else does?  :?

I wanna be covered in oval sucker marks!