You May Be A Republican If
 
    -You believe that Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bushs daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney was doing business with him, and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we cant find Bin Laden" diversion.
 
    -You believe that government should restrict itself to just the powers named in the Constitution, which includes banning gay marriages and censoring the internet.
 
    - You believe that trade with Cuba is wrong because it is communist, but trading with China and Vietnam is good for business.
 
    -You believe that you love Jesus and Jesus loves you, and that Jesus shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary.
 
    -You believe that the best way to encourage military morale is to praise the troops overseas while cutting their VA benefits.
 
    -You believe it is wise to keep condoms out of schools, because we all know if teenagers dont have condoms they wont have sex.
 
    -You believe that tobaccos link to cancer and global warming are "junk science", but Creationism should be taught in schools.