QuoteDell Announce AMD Chips in their sh*t

"Its like being married," The man from Dell told us yesterday over a couple of beers, "Weve been playing with [Intels] boobies for years, always wondering what AMDs felt like. So finally, weve decided to seperate for a while so wecan have a feel of AMDs lovely rack."

You heard it here first.

QuoteBill Finally clears up the 640Kb Quote

"It was a simple mistake, I wonder why I didnt realise earlier. I must have been too busy working on Solitaire-64," Bill said over a mug of hot tea, "What I actually said was 640Jb should be enough for anyone."

We asked what a Jb was. Bill went on to explain a Jb is bigger than anyone could possibly imagine, "Think of it like this; if it was a pair of bikini bottoms, it would be J-Los bikini bottoms."

Wow.

QuoteEA Games manage to piss off some more people

A group of Italian Nuns happened to see an advert for an EA Games title at a local cinema on Saturday, "Well, I don't know what it's all about but it really pissed me off," said one nun, "In fact I'll be writing to my MEP to say SCREW EA!"

EA Games refused to comment, which kinda pissed me off.

QuoteNintendo: Don't forget about us!

The creator of the Mario Brothers, wots-his-name, called upon the gaming population today, "We're still around," he yelled, "You can't discount us in the Next-Gen war!"

He went on to explain how their new console, wots-it-called, will be a ground-breaking system. While it won't be as powerful as the other two, nor have as many games, you can "bet your life that it will be quirky," he said, and it will appeal to all the consolers who "yearn to be different without having to turn gothic or go down the body-piercing route."

QuoteMicrosoft have hinted that this will f**k up pretty much everyone to start off with, but itll get better as end-user wallets empty.

Like all things MS, it will be faster but it will also be slower. Basically:

DX10 = Hardware

DX9 & below = Software

MS will rollout DX10 with Vista, and new hardware will get nice "DX10 ready" stickers if its expensive enough. Anyway with that in mind, I hope they change the DX logo again, version 8 was cooler than version 9..