Step 1: Put a big f**king advert at the top of the page. Make sure it spans the whole width and goes from the top of the screen down to the bowels of Hell. Don't forget the expand to span known Universe code on mouse-over.

Step 2: Put clicky snipers in. I'm looking at you Youtube. Put a slight delay in loading the top advert video so when you go to click on Right Said Knighty, I'm too Sexy, you instead get Ad by Google.

Step 3: Put a huge f**k off banner across the bottom of the screen telling you about cookies.

Step 4: Click to continue to article or wait 15 seconds.

Step 5: Do you have a minute to fill in a short survey?

Step 6: Deliver instructions through video rather than text. People don't like reading instructions or guides on light bulbs any more, they much prefer watching as 15minute video on how to operate a light switch.

So spot on it's not even funny. I've been campaigning to rid my company's website of banners since I started.

Now we've been taken over and the new company wants them gone too, surprise surprise it might finally happen.

Adverts != Conversion

Previous management spent millions on TV campaigns and social advertising. As soon as that was culled and the money pumped back into traditional traffic driving streams, lo and behold conversion rates went back up again.

Haha... Ad Block Plus... the best plugin you can download for your browser of choice!

I'm glad i'm not the only one to notice how sh*t websites have become these days.

Only bit I hate is the pop up test when you pass your mouse over some selected words. Irritating as they stop you reading and are often nothing to do with the page content.

installed my mam's new printer for her earlier

went to the cannon website for driver...  cookies disclaimer took up literally half the page

then the disclaimer you have to click before you can download the driver was so big, the click to continue button was off the bottom of the popup... had to zoom out to about 20% just t see it :-o